motherhood – Carvings on a Desk

Making the Most of Whatever’s Next (But Don’t Mind if I Wallow in a More Carefree Era for a Minute)

Posted by Julie Jo Severson 4 Comments

I’ve always had a worry-riddled mind. Even so, I typically manage to wake up feeling reasonably ready to make the most of whatever’s next.

But I didn’t wake up feeling ready today. Or yesterday. Or the day before. Or any day, it seems, since the insidious, novel coronavirus began hijacking human cells and organs, social interaction, the economy, momentous ceremonies, travel plans, spontaneous outings, and every single aspect of my three teens’ academic and social lives and their certainty for what the near future holds.

Instead of waking up feeling ready to make the most of whatever’s next, I’ve been waking up feeling like my stomach is full of lead.

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Moments of Slight Translucence (Since College Drop-off)

Posted by Julie Jo Severson 14 Comments

Heat pours into my face as I open the oven door. With a mitt on my right hand, I reach in and push the tip of a sharp knife halfway into the thickest part of the salmon.

I’m a mediocre cook at best, but I know the center of a perfectly baked salmon should have a look of slight translucence. As though a glimmer of light is trying to shine through it.

“Just a couple more minutes,” I say to myself. I close the oven door, lean against the counter, take a sip of Merlot, glance out the window, and get lost in thoughts.

The Salmon! I turn to open the oven back up, pull the pan out, and plunk it down on the stovetop. Argh. Nothing glimmering about this orange, flaky lump.

I love salmon. But I never seem to get it quite right.

I feel the tears begin to build. Again. I know they’re not really about the salmon, though.

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A Million Little Letting Go’s

Posted by Julie Jo Severson 12 Comments

It’s a monumental month in my tiny corner of the world. Two reasons. First, I turn a milestone age with a big fat zero in it. I’m entirely grateful but not quite ready to see the full number in print here. That’s all I’m going to say about that. Secondly, this is also the month my first-born crosses the legal threshold into adulthood.

Adulthood.

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The Heart of a Mom’s Summer Chore Charts

Posted by Julie Jo Severson 11 Comments

Just now, I returned from floating on a silver raft.

Not far from a quaint wooden dock.

I was stretched out on my stomach in my skirted swimsuit with the side of my face pressed against the hot plastic.

The lake, clean enough to drink, was perfect as glass. I scooped up a few handfuls and watched it drip through my fingertips into widening ripples.

As the waves of a distant boat rocked gently beneath me and lapped against the shore, I dozed in and out of a peaceful bliss . . . alone with the big blue sky and happy birds.

But then the doggone clothes dryer buzzer went off.

Poof! Daydream over.

Sigh. Back to the task at hand—making summer chore charts for my two teens and a tween.

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The Blueprint for Motherhood

Posted by Julie Jo Severson 13 Comments

Typically, a blueprint for any design or formation provides clear boundaries, dimensions, and timelines so we know exactly what to do to achieve the desired result.

However, the blueprint for motherhood—the most complex endeavor of any other on earth—does no such thing. It does, though, supply a tsunami of biochemical reactions and key mechanisms that keep us perpetually vigilant and help us discern what’s best.

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The Gift for Flight

Posted by Julie Jo Severson 2 Comments

I’m so incredibly honored to have a story published on Grown and Flown today, a wonderful and wise resource where parenting never ends.

The title is “The Gift I Need To Give My Children So Their Wings Are Real.” It’s about the grueling endeavor of seeing our kids struggle or turn corners and the shiny parenting nugget I picked up while wondering in a pit of panic recently that is helping me pause before always rushing in.

Here’s a sneak preview:

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Generations of Mothers

Posted by Julie Jo Severson 41 Comments

In my maternal great-grandmother Lillian’s dining room, next to the buffet that held her special-occasion silverware, was a lovely little writing desk with a feather quill, according to my mom.

To the right of the desk was a full-length closet door mirror. If you turned to look into the mirror while sitting at the desk, you’d almost think there were more and more rooms tunneling deeper inside it.

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When Pieces of Us Get Swooped Away by Motherhood

Posted by Julie Jo Severson 43 Comments

Leaning up against our piano, across from my little white desk where I’m sitting right now, is an old steel-string guitar in a case that won’t snap shut anymore. I used to play it a little.

I bought it when I was in my early 20s on a whim at Homestead Pickin’ Parlor, a quirky little music shop next door to where I worked for an adult literacy program in the basement of a used furniture store. My first “real job” out of college.
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